Considering a performance of Considering Matthew Shepard (#1381)

Topics/tags: Reviews

Trigger warning: Aspects of the murder and associated events appear in this piece

Today I had the privilege to attend a performance of Craig Hella Johnson’s Considering Matthew Shepard by the Grinnell Singers and the Grinnell Oratorio Society. For those who don’t know, the Grinnell Singers are the primary student vocal group at the College, and the Oratorio Society incorporates a wider variety of people, including faculty and townspeople.

I must admit that I’m always a bit nervous to muse about concerts and shows I attend, as well as art I view and music I listen to. I lack the skills to adequately encapsulate in words what makes these performances and works of art special. Part of it is that I lack the skill as a writer. But I also lack the depth of thought to appropriately comment on such works, and my limited knowledge of music and more cannot ground even adequate analysis.

Nonetheless, I want to write something about my experiences. And the only way to learn to write reviews (or whatever these are) is to practice. Hence, I’ll continue to give it a shot (or, I suppose, many shots). I suppose the best approach is to write what my muse suggests and hope that each reader finds something to appreciate.

Let’s start with the performers. As I noted, both the Grinnell Singers and the Grinnell Oratorio Society performed. There were also musicians playing strings, guitar, percussion, piano, and other instruments. Inconveniently, I’ve lost my program, so I can’t include names. Well, that’s not quite true. The legendary JohnRom conducted the piece and, presumably, helped all the performers grow into the piece. John does an amazing job with our students, helping them bring their best to performances and giving them a love of music, no matter their major.

I appreciate seeing (and hearing) students I’ve taught and care about on the stage. I also love seeing and hearing my friends and colleagues. It’s rare that I am able to pick out individual voices, but that’s okay. At times, some of them solo (or, in one case, play the mouth harp), which makes it easier to pick them out. Of course, my eyes are going, so it’s harder than it should be.

I commend all the performers on their work. It was an excellent performance. I’m particularly impressed that they were able to deal with such painful material. I’d be in tears if I tried to perform this work. I suppose I saw at least one performer near tears afterwards.

I was particularly struck by the voice of the baritone who sang some (many?) (all?) of the Matthew parts, such as the Yoodle-ooh, yoodle-ooh-hoo that begins and ends the piece. I don’t have words other than rich to describe it. As I said, my knowledge of these concepts is depressingly shallow. I also very much enjoyed the performance of Keep It Away From Me (The Wound of Love). I recall saying to myself that her voice was quite the opposite of her last name [1]. I also liked the slide guitar on that piece.

I suppose this would be a good time to reflect on the music, or at least some aspects thereof I appreciated the mix of musical forms in CMS. While there was a good deal of what I’d call art music [2], Johnson [3] also incorporated spoken word narrative, a blues piece (the aforementioned Keep It Away From Me), something that sounded more like vocal pop [4] (The Innocence), and even some spirtuals (Meet Me Here).

Come to think of it, the soloists on those pieces were great, too. More broadly, the whole ensemble did well at adapting to the different forms. I guess that’s always been my experience with the Singers and the Oratorio Society. John helps them adapt their voices to a variety of genres and approaches.

The musicians were, I assume, professionals. They supported the singers well. I’ve already implied that the guitarist was versatile; he played slide, electric, and acoustic. I loved the sound of the bass. And, at times, the strings seemed indistinguishable from vocal backing.

Returning to the score, I find myself wishing that I had my offspring’s understanding of music. I can only note that, in addition to appreciating the variety of forms, I liked the interplay between soloists and the broader choir, especially in Fire in the Ancient Heart (or, as I recalled it, that fire song) and Pilgrimage (the one with Hebrew and Om Mani Padme Hum).

Conceptually, I appreciated that Johnson treated The Fence (to which Shepard was tied) as a character—or at least a voice. I’m not sure why it was so meaningful to have The Fence comment on the murder, on Matthew’s struggles, on the people who visited afterwards. But it was. The final stanzas of The Fence (One Week Later) were particularly powerful. I suppose all of it was.

some of them touch me
in unexpected ways
without asking permission
and then move on

but I don’t mind
being a shrine
is better than being
the scene of the crime

I must admit that I mourned upon hearing Recitation X.

The fence has been torn down.

So much of the Shepard case is painful, from the murder to the actions of the Westboro Baptist Church [5] to the effects on others. I appreciate that Johnson managed to find some hope and reflection in assembling the piece. I found I Am Like You particularly moving. I, too, wonder what happened that led the murderers to act as they did. And I, too, wonder if there are worlds in which I may have ended up like them.

The hate implied in the murder and actions of the Westboroans is painful. And that hate remained significant for some years afterwards. One of my hardest times as a faculty member was talking to one of my favorite students who had received a hate note that referenced Matthew Shepard. I still can’t imagine how someone could possess such anger [6].

Still, there seemed to be a time when there was less explicit hate and violence directed at the LGBTQIA+ community. Or maybe I’m just naïve. In any case, it saddens me that such hate has overtaken our country once again. How many more Matthew Shepards will there be?

Wow. That took a dark turn. I apologize. Let’s try some different directions.

As you can tell, I found the performance excellent, the piece moving, and the experience of being there a privilege. I wish I could recommend that you see it, too. Unfortunately, I think this was the last performance. Still, you can watch other performances (online or, on occasion, in person). If a choir or the like performs Considering Matthew Shepard, you should try to attend. And you should definitely attend any upcoming Singers’ performances.

What’s left? Oh, one more thing. I envy the privilege the singers had to participate in such an elegant and eloquent performance, the joy of collaboration, the power to affect others. As much as I’d like to join something like Singers, evidence suggests that I lack the skills to do so. And, even though I embrace a growth mindset, my earlier experience trying to learn to sing indicates that there are some ways I can’t grow.

Oh well. I can still enjoy performances. I can still affect others through my writing. I just wish I had the feeling of collaborating in an ensemble.

Perhaps I’ll need to try again. Maybe that can be a goal for the remainder of my sabbatical.

Postscript: I’ve inevitably left out something about the show [7,8]. But I also know that no matter how hard I try, I’ll still leave something out. Michelle’s voice tells me, The enemy of good is perfect. My muse tells me that I’ve written enough for today. I hope you found some part of value.

[1] Yes, that means that I can probably identify the student. Nonetheless, I’m going to keep people anonymous. Or comparatively anonymous.

[2] Approximately, music for performance in a space like a performance hall.

[3] I checked, it’s Johnson, not Hella Johnson.

[4] At least the kind of pop I grew up with.

[5] How can people who claim to be Christian be so hateful? Didn’t Jesus love the downtrodden, the outsiders?

[6] I’d like to write, such evil, but I’m working to understand others.

[7] Oh! Here’s one thing: I enjoyed meeting the parents of one of my favorite students.

[8] Here’s another: The Singers—and, I believe, the Oratorio Society—performed Considering Matthew Shepard a few years back. I’m not sure what else to write about that.

Version 1.0 of 2025-12-07.